Obama, I'm Telling My Mama

All I know is if I was a kid in school this Tuesday Sept 8 I'd make it known that I object to any and all presidential speeches and demand to be placed immediately in an anti-chamber of some sort. I would also insist to see the security clearance of those local school officials receiving an e-mail directly from the White House without that message being safely funneled through the respective school district offices. It is a little known fact that most assistant superintendents can kill a man 50 different ways with paperwork...in triplicate.

That's 150 different ways people. Whoa

If my teacher asked why I objected to the speech, I'd say, "Talk is cheap and this guy is the president. Shouldn't he be blowing something up or smashing a bottle of booze on a skyscraper or shit like that?!?!"

These are the kind of important lessons a man learns at home.

Finally I'd accept a provision that brought me back for the end of the speech, ONLY IF...the president told us what was on the hot lunch menu for the week.

"Change is coming to America children. But Tuesday is still burger and creamed corn day in the cafeteria."

dammit