Hosta La Vista Baby
Kim and I spent a good part of the day gardening together. Those who haven’t been to our house, we have a corner lot and my lack of yard work acumen has lowered property values all around us. Just think what I could do to a cul de sack (spelling intentional).
One of my jobs was to dig out some of our hostas – which are wonderful plants (I guess, they never did anything to me) but the assignment led to the following shtick…
Me (after digging out hosta and putting it in yard waste bag) “Hosta La Vista baby!”
*silence
Me: “Kim, did you hear that? I dug out one of the hostas and said hosta la vista baby.”
Kim: “I heard you honey.”
Me: “You saw Terminator 2 didn’t you?”
Kim: “Yes, we saw it together.”
Me: “Remember when Arnold…”
Kim: “Yes honey, I remember.”
Me: “Kim, if some corporation came here and bought all these plants could we call it a hosta takeover?”
Kim: “I want a divorce.”
We had a lot of fun yesterday. I took Alex to his grandparents this morning. The boy loves going to the OF and while I love working with our little Boog…Kim was on a mission today. No fucking around. She really is an amazing person. She came up with a plan that sort of forced us to finish everything she planned to do. There was no convenient stopping point.
We were tired and sore by 8pm – when we stopped for the day…
…but it was a good tired and sore.
Plus I snuck in the house from time to time to watch the SOX and Redlegs.
Day Two is today. I’ve got a feeling that Kim will keep her eye on the backdoor.
Not that you sick bastards!
One of my jobs was to dig out some of our hostas – which are wonderful plants (I guess, they never did anything to me) but the assignment led to the following shtick…
Me (after digging out hosta and putting it in yard waste bag) “Hosta La Vista baby!”
*silence
Me: “Kim, did you hear that? I dug out one of the hostas and said hosta la vista baby.”
Kim: “I heard you honey.”
Me: “You saw Terminator 2 didn’t you?”
Kim: “Yes, we saw it together.”
Me: “Remember when Arnold…”
Kim: “Yes honey, I remember.”
Me: “Kim, if some corporation came here and bought all these plants could we call it a hosta takeover?”
Kim: “I want a divorce.”
We had a lot of fun yesterday. I took Alex to his grandparents this morning. The boy loves going to the OF and while I love working with our little Boog…Kim was on a mission today. No fucking around. She really is an amazing person. She came up with a plan that sort of forced us to finish everything she planned to do. There was no convenient stopping point.
We were tired and sore by 8pm – when we stopped for the day…
…but it was a good tired and sore.
Plus I snuck in the house from time to time to watch the SOX and Redlegs.
Day Two is today. I’ve got a feeling that Kim will keep her eye on the backdoor.
Not that you sick bastards!
posted by edP | 7:17 AM
4 Comments:
If someone took the hosta and held it captive, it would be held hostage.
Edp, take comfort in the knowledge that, when the divorce goes through, you and the hostas can bust each other up all summer long. Wait'll you hear their "Ed" puns ... they've got a million of 'em.
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