Behaving Badly Better
Lost steam at the end of work Friday. Cruised at 3:30pm, picked up the Cooks and brought her to the vet. She had some annual stuff and she injured her paw again. Stupid fucking Berber. Is that supposed to be capitalized? Jeanz? The 588-2300 Empire guy? Anyone?
Got Cookie sorted out...sort of. Stopped back at the hhe to get my check. Cookie brought work to a screeching halt as everyone Oooohd and Ahhhd and she went to the floor, tits up (more on that later) to let everyone see her tat, pet her belly and love her. I was just grateful to have gotten the fuck out of there before she did one of her submission pees. Odd numbered boobs, strange faded tattoo, the potential for piss and shit everywhere...life with that chihuahua is a lot like not-as-hard-to-get-anymore European pornography.
Entered my house and Kim's folks were there. I talked for a bit but had to run to the bank and then take Alex to the new Target. They only had one Shadow Ice Wolf Ninja costume in medium on the shelves...and I wasn't even sure that medium would fit him.
It did.
Beer, broasted chicken and pizza.
Yummm. Thanks Al and Judi.
Family movie night was the rest of the Trial of the Incredible Hulk.
Mr. J came to pick me up and the boy was excited to see him. I tried to convince everyone to come to Twins because I have some electrical issues with the bar car and both of my taillights have been taking turns going on the blink...by that I mean going out, not blinking. Turn signals blink.
Josh said he'd pick me up and some somewhat sober combination of him, the Old Dog or a designated driver to be named later would get everyone home safely. I believed him.
Saw Old Diggy, Paulio, Suzanne, Beerman, The Roos...ster, they were all out for K's birthday (she has not be traduced, that was Joseph K) and even Bill Garver was there. We also celebrated Bill being invited to speak at a big cocktail/booze convention in New Orleans. I don't want to undermine his reputation here, but he was not drinking at all. When pressed he said the police were out in force and he didn't want to get popped. If he doesn't start exhibiting more "bad decision making" regarding booze, they're going to stop inviting him to speak at cocktail conventions.
I'm proud of Bill for his responsibility. I'm even prouder of him for continuing to make money talking and writing about booze. But I'm proudest of Mr. J and I. In our old age I have to say we have found more responsible and fun ways to make trouble.
This girl I sort of know from outside the Annex came up and introduced herself. She was friendly and there was nothing naughty. Later she came back to our table a little tipsier and wanted to have someone take a picture of her standing next to me. I don't know what the protocol is here, and again I'm sure she had no hidden agenda but I'm a married guy who is very easy to find on the interwebs. I don't want to be befriended and tagged in pictures on the Book o Face that can be interpreted as being snuggly or some shit with a woman that is not my wife. I am a bad husband in so many ways but I will never do something that could be construed as disrespectful to Kim in that way. Does that make sense?
Just as I was politely explaining by position on such pics a fight broke out near our table. Thinking quickly, Mr. J said to the girl, "Give me your camera." Annex Security (a coalition of the not as drunk as the rest of us) were ushering the troublemaker out of the bar. Josh said "Ed! Make it look like you're getting thrown out with Sasquatch over there."
The guy being extricated was pretty friggin tall.
I wish I had the pics because they were hilarious. I did all sorts of thumb-action shots making it look like I was with dude-guy about to get tossed. I did one that made it look like my hands were on his shoulders and pushing him out. There was even one where you can see this drunk asshole slowly realizing that following his failed fight, he was now the butt of some other joke being perpetrated by douchebags from the other coroner of the bar (us).
Even though the girl who originally wanted the photo didn't find this as funny as we did, it felt like progress to me. In the past we would've been in the fight or have instigated the fight to get out of the unwanted social expectation. Now we are learning how to exploit the boobery of others rather than creating our own.
Nice.
Made it back to OD's and played guitar. J and I agreed it was a successful and relatively laid back night...even though I drank limeless and tasty tequila with my good friend from work, Shane. 1800 (or some like tequila) shots used to be like the red light on the Batphone for me. If it's going off you know there's trouble everywhere. I told Josh that I was also impressed that he could still carry me like a bride (while we had the girl's camera we gave it to someone else, Josh picked me up and carried me over the metaphoric threshold located in the bowels of the Annex). I said "Dude, you're a strong and good friend and got me out of another one. You gave that girl her camera didn't you."
J mumbled something and trailed off...
"That's good enough for me. If I should outlive you, and I ain't too broke up I might play this song over you as you sink into that great big, stinky Annex in the dirt...er sky...er gloaming...."
It's 4am Somewhere
Every time I put my whiskey down
You're right there to buy us another round
You're hurtin' now but you wanna make a bet
You'll still be after one more cigarette
It's 4am somewhere and I'm sure
We don't need to be drinking anymore
We're waiting here like strangers all alone
We've lived to see bread be turned to stone
If there's one thing in the world
This crowd will never know
Is you can leave
You can go home
You can leave
You can go home
You can leave
You can go home
Ooops, I forgot to explain the whole "tits up" thing. Well let's just make this the most pointless cliffhanger ever...
Got Cookie sorted out...sort of. Stopped back at the hhe to get my check. Cookie brought work to a screeching halt as everyone Oooohd and Ahhhd and she went to the floor, tits up (more on that later) to let everyone see her tat, pet her belly and love her. I was just grateful to have gotten the fuck out of there before she did one of her submission pees. Odd numbered boobs, strange faded tattoo, the potential for piss and shit everywhere...life with that chihuahua is a lot like not-as-hard-to-get-anymore European pornography.
Entered my house and Kim's folks were there. I talked for a bit but had to run to the bank and then take Alex to the new Target. They only had one Shadow Ice Wolf Ninja costume in medium on the shelves...and I wasn't even sure that medium would fit him.
It did.
Beer, broasted chicken and pizza.
Yummm. Thanks Al and Judi.
Family movie night was the rest of the Trial of the Incredible Hulk.
Mr. J came to pick me up and the boy was excited to see him. I tried to convince everyone to come to Twins because I have some electrical issues with the bar car and both of my taillights have been taking turns going on the blink...by that I mean going out, not blinking. Turn signals blink.
Josh said he'd pick me up and some somewhat sober combination of him, the Old Dog or a designated driver to be named later would get everyone home safely. I believed him.
Saw Old Diggy, Paulio, Suzanne, Beerman, The Roos...ster, they were all out for K's birthday (she has not be traduced, that was Joseph K) and even Bill Garver was there. We also celebrated Bill being invited to speak at a big cocktail/booze convention in New Orleans. I don't want to undermine his reputation here, but he was not drinking at all. When pressed he said the police were out in force and he didn't want to get popped. If he doesn't start exhibiting more "bad decision making" regarding booze, they're going to stop inviting him to speak at cocktail conventions.
I'm proud of Bill for his responsibility. I'm even prouder of him for continuing to make money talking and writing about booze. But I'm proudest of Mr. J and I. In our old age I have to say we have found more responsible and fun ways to make trouble.
This girl I sort of know from outside the Annex came up and introduced herself. She was friendly and there was nothing naughty. Later she came back to our table a little tipsier and wanted to have someone take a picture of her standing next to me. I don't know what the protocol is here, and again I'm sure she had no hidden agenda but I'm a married guy who is very easy to find on the interwebs. I don't want to be befriended and tagged in pictures on the Book o Face that can be interpreted as being snuggly or some shit with a woman that is not my wife. I am a bad husband in so many ways but I will never do something that could be construed as disrespectful to Kim in that way. Does that make sense?
Just as I was politely explaining by position on such pics a fight broke out near our table. Thinking quickly, Mr. J said to the girl, "Give me your camera." Annex Security (a coalition of the not as drunk as the rest of us) were ushering the troublemaker out of the bar. Josh said "Ed! Make it look like you're getting thrown out with Sasquatch over there."
The guy being extricated was pretty friggin tall.
I wish I had the pics because they were hilarious. I did all sorts of thumb-action shots making it look like I was with dude-guy about to get tossed. I did one that made it look like my hands were on his shoulders and pushing him out. There was even one where you can see this drunk asshole slowly realizing that following his failed fight, he was now the butt of some other joke being perpetrated by douchebags from the other coroner of the bar (us).
Even though the girl who originally wanted the photo didn't find this as funny as we did, it felt like progress to me. In the past we would've been in the fight or have instigated the fight to get out of the unwanted social expectation. Now we are learning how to exploit the boobery of others rather than creating our own.
Nice.
Made it back to OD's and played guitar. J and I agreed it was a successful and relatively laid back night...even though I drank limeless and tasty tequila with my good friend from work, Shane. 1800 (or some like tequila) shots used to be like the red light on the Batphone for me. If it's going off you know there's trouble everywhere. I told Josh that I was also impressed that he could still carry me like a bride (while we had the girl's camera we gave it to someone else, Josh picked me up and carried me over the metaphoric threshold located in the bowels of the Annex). I said "Dude, you're a strong and good friend and got me out of another one. You gave that girl her camera didn't you."
J mumbled something and trailed off...
"That's good enough for me. If I should outlive you, and I ain't too broke up I might play this song over you as you sink into that great big, stinky Annex in the dirt...er sky...er gloaming...."
It's 4am Somewhere
Every time I put my whiskey down
You're right there to buy us another round
You're hurtin' now but you wanna make a bet
You'll still be after one more cigarette
It's 4am somewhere and I'm sure
We don't need to be drinking anymore
We're waiting here like strangers all alone
We've lived to see bread be turned to stone
If there's one thing in the world
This crowd will never know
Is you can leave
You can go home
You can leave
You can go home
You can leave
You can go home
Ooops, I forgot to explain the whole "tits up" thing. Well let's just make this the most pointless cliffhanger ever...
posted by edP | 12:34 PM
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